Steps Forward

One thing my husband and I are focusing on at this time is putting one foot in front of the other and just moving forward.  Its a bit of a struggle because both of us are feeling quite dull or uninspired.  Yes, we know this is a logical and expected emotion.

For me, my days have been quite flipped around.  I know today is Thursday and yet I woke this morning and thought, well… its been exactly one week since my mother-in-law died at 7:08 a.m. our time.  And then, I realized, nope I had passed that moment yesterday and didn’t even realize it.

The laundry sits on our floor waiting to be sorted and folded.  I had pulled all of our storage containers out last Wednesday morning and planned on sorting through them.  Pulling out clothes that fit and packing away winter clothes, keeping out only a few sweaters and pairs of long sleeved/legged items for cooler weather.  So now, thanks to my children’s *help* I have tons of clothes all over.  The mess just makes me want to scream.

But not pick it up, lol!

Today I plan on burning a candle and having my favourite “Invigorating” aroma therapy oils in an infusion over it.  I find I react really well to aroma-therapy.  And hope that will cut through some of the fog and get me moving more enthusiastically today.

That being said, I did more yesterday than I did the day before.  Last night I cooked one of our favourite meals, Coconut Curried Beef.  Again, I slipped up and added too much lemon juice.  I’ll admit I’m a little liberal when it comes to that lemon juice!

Yesterday was my brother’s birthday.  So my husband and I drove out to my parent’s farm, where he lives, and decorated the door to his apartment with the kids.  It was fun and I think we needed to do that.

I also have a cousin-in-law who owns a nursery in Cambridge, so we stopped by and explained our family plans to create a memorial garden and he advised us of the plants we could plant and about how much space to prepare, how to prepare the soil, etc.  I told friends yesterday… the last thing you want is to plant a memorial garden with the children and then… have it wither and die!

So yes… each day is consisting of pushing ourselves to do a wee bit more than yesterday and just putting one foot out and moving forward.  And coffee.  I will admit there are copious amounts of coffee involved.

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One Response to Steps Forward

  1. dreamom says:

    I think you are doing fantastic. Plans are the best way to move forward. That being said, if someone offers you help, a meal, anything. Just do it. It might give you the energy you need for things people can’t help with…

    The memorial is a great idea, and you will have to show us pictures…

    One year I forgot a moment similar to yours, and it took me a year to decide if it was a bad thing…

    Praying for you 🙂 Missing you 😦

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