A Need for Quiet

I find myself craving and yearning for solitude and complete quietness.  In away, I do feel a bit guilty of this desire.  Simply because I find that I don’t handle my desire in the best way.

I have this thing where I will find myself kind of looking at my actions and going, “How completely ridiculous and ironic!”

Like when I’ve tried to give myself a bit of alone time and either sent the kids outside to play and then I find myself yelling at them to go away and leave me alone so I can have quiet.

Or lately I’ve instituted Siesta Hour at our house.  A time when you are in your room, or in my case the main living area as Daddy owns our room for sleeping during the day, and I end up getting so frustrated with the constant door openings and “Mommy, I need ….” that I end up yelling or slamming doors myself.

Not what I want.  However, that being said.  I think Siesta Hour is going to stay.  I think it is a really good idea for the sanity of all of us!  It occurs once we’ve cleaned up lunch dishes.  I have them have a glass of water, go to the restroom, and then into their rooms.  I set my Flylady timer on the table and set it for 60 minutes.  The idea is that they must stay in their rooms for that long.  Minimum.

I hope to eventually train them to stay there quietly and allow me to nap if I so choose.  They are old enough that I no longer need to encourage them every 5 minutes, in my opinion.  Nor do I need to encourage them along a simple task.

While doing school work, my need for quiet comes out in insisting that I am not going to look at their work until they are done unless I can see that their frustration or nerves are causing them to believe that they can’t complete the exercise.  Then I will assist them for a problem or two.  But I want them to do their work.  Skipping if the need arises, but just doing the work.

I find it is difficult for my nearly 6 year old daughter.  But in most ways she is more mature than my son.

The potty thing is my biggest sticking stone and I think I am going to make this my battle.  My daughter does have kidney issues, and in the past anytime she said she had to go I simply said fine.  But I’ve noticed the inconvenience of these bladder moments.  Or perhaps convenience!  So I have told her point blank, if you have gone you will not need to go in the next hour.

I have to tell you, she’s smart.  Today she came back stating well, it wasn’t really a bladder issue, but an intestinal issue and she simply must go.  I let her go once but the second time I said no.  She turned around and slammed her door saying, “I’m going to get stipated and it is simply all your fault!”

I tell you, even though I was laughing I really just wished I could have an uninterrupted 15 minutes while I felt energetic.  I get them at night, but I’m tired!

Lol!  I’m going to stop now before I start whining!

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2 Responses to A Need for Quiet

  1. BrendaS says:

    I’m with ya! I totally understand the need for the quiet time. I have done that many times on the frustrating days…sent the two children to their rooms to do something ‘so quiet that I can’t hear them’!!!! I would like to regularly schedule it in too, as I think it is a good character builder teaching them how to spend time in quietness and how to develop an interest that is quiet…i.e. building something, drawing, reading. All these are good things to do when the perpetual ACTION has to stop for a while!

    My kids have gotten smart…when they want to go outside, or watch a movie and they know I am fried, they give the reason for wanting to do one of the above activities as ‘…so you can get some peace and quiet, Mom!’. Sold! Sure kids, you can do that!!!! 🙂

    I am at the REALLY TIRED stage too. I think the end of the school year does that to you. Since you are continuing on with school during the summer…you do need to schedule some rest times in for yourself! Go for it!

    Brenda

  2. Elaine says:

    Quiet time is crucial to one’s sanity. I find that most days, especially when we’re doing school, I need it twice. I get up extra early so that I can have the first hour or so of my day to myself (I really need to make this time God’s and not mine as the day is even better then). In the afternoon, around 2:30 or 3:00 I like to get about 30+ min to have some quiet time where I can unwind and de-stress before having to begin dinner preperations.

    When my kids were small I took a hint from a good friend. She would put her youngest down for her nap and tell her oldest (her kids are about the same ages as mine) that he had to stay in his room and on his bed doing quiet activities. He could read, draw, do puzzles as long as he stayed on his bed and kept it quiet. I began the same routine. It worked great even when my youngest was too old for naps. They learned that when they gave me my time that I was nicer in the evening and not near as controlling if I had time to rest. My hubby also notices the change as I was a happier wife when he got home from work. 🙂

    So don’t feel guilty for demanding your time. Trust me you kids will survive and don’t forget to tell your dd the story about the boy who cried wolf.

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